tw: rape apologism, victim blaming, ableist slurs

holymotherofrowling:

stoogette:

relentlessfortitude:

dustedsunshine:

magickaatt:

Claiming that women don’t deserve to share in the blame for dressing like a whore and getting raped is retarded.

Should women be able to dress like whores and not get raped? Yeah, in the same way I should be able to make a suit out of money and not get robbed. But if I do wear that suit and get robbed, you can’t say I’m blameless for being a total fucking moron. 

Is one crime worse than the other? Probably. But both of them are instances of a person defying common sense and suffering the consequences. If a person who does not heed common sense is not blameworthy, then who is?

The fact we tell women not to dress like whores to avoid rape isn’t evidence of some grand pro-rape conspiracy, or of some imaginary rape culture, it’s a common sense precaution. Of course society DOES tell us don’t rape and steal — that obviously isn’t enough to fully protect us.

The fact that you tagged this with “rape” followed by “lol” will make every woman you encounter want to punch you in the face, but let’s talk civilly about this.

(quick warning to followers - I’m going to talk about rape. If you feel this might upset you or trigger you, please, scroll past.)

You lose the argument when you compare a woman’s body to money. One is the undeniable property of a human being, the other is a commodity. Do you consider a woman’s body to be an object that can be passed around and used by many people without consent? Because by comparing her to money, you suggest so. You imply that a woman’s body is not her own. You imply that simply by being a woman and wearing clothes, women invite rape.

And dude, I hate to break it to you, but that’s wrong.

You also assume that all women who get raped are “dressed like whores.” This is, in fact, way off the mark. Psychologically, rape has very little to do with arousal and a hell of a lot to do with power. Most rapists know their victims (the stats vary from country to country, but it’s usually within the 50% - 70% of victims knew their rapist). Most rapists plan their attacks, and most take place in the victim’s home, a family member’s home or a friend’s home. So saying that it’s a woman’s fault for dressing a certain way is complete bullshit. Got that? Bullshit. Rapists do not rape because she’s wearing a short skirt. Rapists rape because they get a feeling of power and satisfaction from violating and overpowering their victim.

Of course, this isn’t always so, and of course, there are occasions when men do fucking horrible things to women they’ve never met - which boils down to the fact that society DOES teach that you shouldn’t get raped, rather than you shouldn’t rape, by telling women that it’s their own fault that someone stronger than them physically violates their body.

Please, just for a second, try and imagine that women are bigger and stronger. Please try and imagine that men are more frequently raped than women. Please try and imagine a world in which your wearing tight jeans or a shirt with a few buttons undone can lead to someone bigger and stronger than you physically violating you by penetrating you against your will. Can you imagine that?

No, you probably can’t. Because it is unlikely to ever happen to you.

You would be a total fucking moron for walking around in a suit of money, but here’s the thing: you can take off that suit of money, or choose not to wear it. Women can’t just take off their bodies. They can’t just say, “hey, I’m going to leave my vagina at home today.” Considering that I’ve already explained to you that more women who get raped aren’t “dressed like whores,” you’re essentially saying that women deserve to be raped for being women, and wearing clothes. Which, once again, turns you into a victim-blaming arsehole.

Now, onto rape culture is imaginary.

Kindly go fuck yourself, dear ignorant stranger, and then when you’re done, please read up on how many rapes are reported, and of that percentage, how many rapists are convicted. Rape culture is the concept that it is a woman’s fault that a man took her bodily autonomy from her. Rape culture is the idea that men cannot control their physical urges to the point that they violate another human being. So when we talk about rape culture, we’re talking about the fact that rape is the most under-reported violent crime (usually a third or less of rapes and attempted rapes are reported). We’re talking about the fact that women are left feeling that what happened to them was their own fault, and do not report it. We’re talking about the fact that when a woman does have the courage to report it, the first question she’s asked is frequently “were you drunk?” or “what were you wearing?” rather than “who was he?” and “when did this happen?” We’re talking about the fact that, of the rapists who are reported, less than 10% are convicted. We’re talking about the fact that in a survey of young men at university age, over 50% admitted they would violate a women when the wording was changed to “force her to have sex” instead of “rape her.”

So don’t claim that it’s imaginary, you conceited arsehole. Don’t you fucking dare.

(Ugh, perfect response. As usual.)

It’s so infuriating when men say that women are, even a tiny bit, to blame for being raped or sexually assaulted. 

I live in a small village. No crime. Last night I walked to work in a polo shirt and long trousers, nothing tight or clingy, and in the two miles, I was cat-called twice by drunken yobs. A large stretch of that road has no lights. If I had been raped, would I have been blamed? Were my orthopedic work shoes too sexy? Was I tempting men by wearing my hair back in a tight bun? 

No. 

But if in the same scenario I was wearing a tight top and skirt, but walking calmly, headphones in my ears, and I was attacked, then yes, I would have been blamed for tempting them. 

It’s all bullshit. The way you dress does not dictate whether or not you’re going to be raped. Wearing a skirt would not mean pinning a shirt to my back saying ‘Come and get it, boys!’. 

So people need to shut the fuck up. 

Right. This is not something I often talk about, but let’s have it.

I was a child the first time I was raped, do tell me how can I be blamed for that… I fucking dare you.

Was I showing of my pre-pubescent body? Was my floor length night gown too revealing? How about the long johns I had underneath? Was I asking for it while I was tucked away in my bed dreaming about the Land Before Time?

Rape is rape. The only person you can blame is the rapist. It’s as simple as that. 

I deleted the pictures because the OP’s comparison could definitely be triggering and I can’t trigger warn before a picture.